Archive for October, 2009
“I’m not no racist… I let blacks use my bathroom and everything…”
Perhaps I should have called this: “Douche Bags in Positions of Power.”
After reading this article it makes me wonder about his stance on adopting transracially. I mean, it’s clearly myopic to think that all couples will only be having biological children. You’d think in order to ensure “the races don’t mix” he’d ask the couples if they have any plans to adopt or would even consider adopting… and if so, would they try and adopt outside of their own race. I wonder if he’d refuse to marry them on the grounds they’d be raising “one of those… ewwwwww.”
And what if you are biracial and wish to marry? Are you just screwed? Cause you know you are not completely white or black or indian or asian. No worries, a life of quiet solitude is just as fulfilling.
DOUCHE!!!!
w.huffingtonpost.com/2009/10/15/interracial-couple-denied_n_322784.html
NEW ORLEANS — A Louisiana justice of the peace said he refused to issue a marriage license to an interracial couple out of concern for any children the couple might have. Keith Bardwell, justice of the peace in Tangipahoa Parish, says it is his experience that most interracial marriages do not last long.
“I’m not a racist. I just don’t believe in mixing the races that way,” Bardwell told the Associated Press on Thursday. “I have piles and piles of black friends. They come to my home, I marry them, they use my bathroom. I treat them just like everyone else.”
Bardwell said he asks everyone who calls about marriage if they are a mixed race couple. If they are, he does not marry them, he said.
Bardwell said he has discussed the topic with blacks and whites, along with witnessing some interracial marriages. He came to the conclusion that most of black society does not readily accept offspring of such relationships, and neither does white society, he said.
“There is a problem with both groups accepting a child from such a marriage,” Bardwell said. “I think those children suffer and I won’t help put them through it.”
If he did an interracial marriage for one couple, he must do the same for all, he said.
“I try to treat everyone equally,” he said.
Bardwell estimates that he has refused to marry about four couples during his career, all in the past 2 1/2 years.
Humphrey, an account manager for a marketing firm, said she and McKay, a welder, just returned to Louisiana. She is white and he is black. She plans to enroll in the University of New Orleans to pursue a masters degree in minority politics.
“That was one thing that made this so unbelievable,” she said. “It’s not something you expect in this day and age.”
Humphrey said she called Bardwell on Oct. 6 to inquire about getting a marriage license signed. She says Bardwell’s wife told her that Bardwell will not sign marriage licenses for interracial couples. Bardwell suggested the couple go to another justice of the peace in the parish who agreed to marry them.
“We are looking forward to having children,” Humphrey said. “And all our friends and co-workers have been very supportive. Except for this, we’re typical happy newlyweds.”
“It is really astonishing and disappointing to see this come up in 2009,” said American Civil Liberties Union of Louisiana attorney Katie Schwartzmann. She said the Supreme Court ruled in 1967 “that the government cannot tell people who they can and cannot marry.”
The ACLU sent a letter to the Louisiana Judiciary Committee, which oversees the state justices of the peace, asking them to investigate Bardwell and recommending “the most severe sanctions available, because such blatant bigotry poses a substantial threat of serious harm to the administration of justice.”
“He knew he was breaking the law, but continued to do it,” Schwartzmann said.
According to the clerk of court’s office, application for a marriage license must be made three days before the ceremony because there is a 72-hour waiting period. The applicants are asked if they have previously been married. If so, they must show how the marriage ended, such as divorce.
Other than that, all they need is a birth certificate and Social Security card.
The license fee is $35, and the license must be signed by a Louisiana minister, justice of the peace or judge. The original is returned to the clerk’s office.
“I’ve been a justice of the peace for 34 years and I don’t think I’ve mistreated anybody,” Bardwell said. “I’ve made some mistakes, but you have to. I didn’t tell this couple they couldn’t get married. I just told them I wouldn’t do it.”
You just cannot make this stuff up!
I get back from my absolutely fabulous Dominican vacation and a girlfriend is practically falling all over herself to tell me a story.
Side note: whenever anyone hears anything remotely related to adoption, I am immediately tracked down and told about it… almost as if I might know the people in question. You know, how all adoptive parents or pap’s or adoptees or first moms must know each other.
Anyhoo, back to the story:
Girlfriend sees gorgeous little Chinese girl in Zellers (Like Target for you Americans) with her white parents. Again, I should note that when anyone sees Chinese girls (regardless of whether or not they are adopted), friends and family become immediately entranced and tell me all the ways they imagine that she could mine.
Well… girlfriend cannot help herself and goes up to mom and comments on daughter’s beauty to which the mom of course smiles and says thank you. Little girl is about 4 and girlfriend tells the mom all about her friend (me) who is also adopting from China and preceeds to tell mom about the long wait and blah, blah.
Mom (looking confused): That’s nice but my daughter isn’t adopted.
Friend (also confused) and apologizes thinking that maybe the man that was with them at Zellers wasn’t the dad or he was the step dad or whatever.
Little girl (claps her hands): I was born in China, right daddy?
Mom was uncomfortable and motions for dad to take little girl away to look at jewellery or something.
Mom (upset): We don’t announce to strangers that she is adopted.
Friend: I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to upset anybody, it’s just my friend…
Mom: It’s okay. Yes, she’s adopted but for now we think it’s best that we keep things simple and not dwell on it.
Friend: (Not getting it). But she knows she was born in China…
Mom: Well yes. We told her that the reason she doesn’t look like us is because she was born in China. If you are born in China, you look Chinese. We can add in the adopted part later.
I asked my friend if she was bullshitting me with this as there’s just no way anyone could think they could get away with this.
“True story,” she said. “I swear on my Ben & Jerry’s Cookie Dough Ice Cream.”
Swear on her beloved ice cream? Yep, she means business.
Happy Thanksgiving to all my fellow Canadians!!!
Things I am thankful for:
1. My family – they are crazy, vulgar, overwhelming, funny, generous and loving.
2. My husband – who loves me unconditionally, makes me laugh like no one else and is my own personal Batman… oh and he’s crazy hot 🙂
3. My friends – I have a very small circle of folks that I consider friends and they are wonderful and supportive and appreciate my warped sense of humour.
4. My talents. My humour. My quirks. My dysfunctions. I have grown to appreciate my “unusualness.”
5. The Internet – The conversations. The debates. The advice. The answers. I honestly do not understand how our parents ever knew how to be parents without the internet. And adoptive parenting… well, all I can say is that speaking to AP’s, PAP’s, first moms and adoptees has all been invaluable.
6. Free will – Until you have seen how other countries operate, you really don’t have any clue what a blessing free will is and how fortunate we are to be able to exercise it.
7. Life – I wasn’t always thrilled to be here and at one time I never expected to live past 23. Dark days. Dark days. But it is possible to come out the other side and realize that you really are stronger than you ever gave yourself credit for.
And a multitude of other things that make life one crazy, tumultuous, exciting ride.
Oh and of course I am thankful people take the time to read my ramblings 🙂
I’ll have a Pina Colada for you!!!!!
Mad Hatter and I are heading to the sunny beaches of Punta Cana, Dominican Republic for a week.
Well, sunny-ish – as it is the rainy season.
But who cares, I love the rain… and I love that it is 35 C.
And I love that I don’t have to cook or clean or work or go to meetings.
And I can plan my day around when we are eating next.
I loves me some of that :))))
the disloyal subject of the red queen 